I don't blame you for being you.

You like being in control of every situation possible. You strive for it if you're not. You want to be noticed, in fact you are, you're just not appriciated enough. Contol and apprication are two different emotions yet we combine them together. They clash, they can never be in the same sentence, even.

Control is the ability to have power. Ah, yes, power. Power is important to you sometimes it's much more important than control, it's as if you're going to use it to save the world, but really, you only need it to save you and your feelings.


Carefree, they're those people who does not care what goes on around them. Free mind and spirit. They are fearless. Their eyes are happy, sometimes emotionless but somewhat still content. They are in control of some certain situations, still. Everyone has that ability in them, that's why there's limts. Sometimes they think, but not too much. They don't hold on or fight to win, they let go. They jump, leap, they are the peaceful ones. Their life is not a blur, they sleep at night while you are still thinking how to win over.

In the end, they don't care about your power or control and only care how to free their mind and heart; no bruises. Just memories. Maybe.


They don't want to want.
They don't need to need.

You should try it, you'll feel much better. Still, i really don't blame you for being you. You should never ever lose hope, you'll end up the biggest loser.

You read my mind, i appricate you, but that does not mean you have any control over me.

Second Month of the New Year.

So far, so good.

It's been too long again dear you,

I've been lacking the creativity, or maybe not; just not having the time.

But today, i needed to vent, so i did.

Sometimes I really get the urge to scream.
I scream in the inside a lot of times. Out of frustration, out of happiness.

This life is too exciting, yet too risky business.

Every year, every month, every day, every second, something happens for a reason.
I don’t think so,

I just think that you just create and control your own reality.

You’re on a bus thinking about how you got here. Then you’re at home in your room sitting quietly staring at nothing-ness thinking the same thing you were thinking this morning. How the hell did you get here?

You need so much and when you have it you just want to lose it and forget it. You always remember but you still risk it.

No matter what, you know you live in misery business. (Sometimes atleast.)

Goodbye 2009, Hello 2010.

I simply still cannot believe that i'm staring a New Year.
I have no idea why i feel so surprised.

2009 was a one hell of a year, yet it was still nice.

I have no resolutions. I think they're pointless and if i make one, i know that i will just let myself down.

I'm hoping that 2010 will be a better year for me, then again, i always say this when a new year comes.

I think this year, i'm just going to sit, be calm, relaxed and whatever happens, just happens.

Life is full of surprises. This year won't be any different.

Happy New Year dear reader.

Facebook Wins.

According to one of the quizes i took:

You're more quiet and shy,now. Shy not antisocial. Once you warm up to someone, it's easier for you. You become more outgoing. You are indecisive, you're like, "whateve, it's cool." You're laid back, and you hate the drama, but yet you find it in your life more than you like. You use to be out going. You used to laugh a lot more. You had some life changing experiences that changed who you were...and you miss it.You are probably scattered brain or easily forgetting things. Clumsly as well. A walking accident if you will. You can be random, and somewhat morbid. You're favorite color is probably red, or something vivid. You have a different way of looking at things and understanding things. You are easy to talk to, and only take your problems to certain people. You like to have fun, but now scared to go all out. You let fear run your life. And you STILL dont know what or who you want. You're favorite saying is, "its complicated." You care so deeply about people. You're sensitive. You have a good heart. You get hurt a lot, and you often wonder if that someone really cares. Your special but you will never see it.


Red is not my favourite colour.

But that paragraph wins.

Neglect.

Think of me,
Think of me,
When you're out there.

I'm begging nice from my knees.

&& when the world treats you way too fairly,
it's a shame i'm a dream.

All i wanted was ....

Explain to me this conspiracy against me...

Where can I turn?

Cause I need something more.

- Just Turn It Off.

The Feeling.

I still:

like too many things and get all confused and hung up running from one falling star to another till I drop.

My life is based on true events.

I'll never miss it for the world.

I can't describe myself in just one word.

There's too many.

I'm simple yet so complex.

Flawed, crazy, lonesome, nervous all the time.

Yet, i'm still at my happiest.

That's all i ever wanted.

For now. At least i have it.

Till then,

Only God knows.

I'll never know.

You'll never know.

Anything can happen.

The idea of waiting for something makes it more exciting.

I scraped my knees while i was praying...

Hello fellow readers.

It's been too long since i last rambled on here.

Let's look at the last post, shall we?

School started and ended for me, this year.

It doesn't mean that my scholastic year is so over, no way. I like school, i like learning just not learning or be in the school or subjects i used to study about.

I don't miss my old school at all, as weird as it sounds. I like my life better now.

The lesson that i really learned from this experience is that; nothing, really nothing goes according to plan.

I highly suggest for you dear readers that if you're planning your whole life already, seriously you're wasting your time. I wasted mine and hopefully i'm done with that.

Be happy with what you have, be patient, clever and do what you think is right. Never do anything because someone told you so. It's your life, you're going to live it. Not your family, not your best friend or your boyfriend. It's all about you.

&& don't give a crap if someone tries to put you down or tries to make you feel inferior than them. That means that they feel scared shitless and much more inferior than you.

I guess that's it.

I'm happy, you're happy. =)

Take care,

xoxo S.